03 March 2008

Carnivorous fairies

While we were camping at the Corinbank festival for 4 days, Ella and I had plenty of opportunity to talk while we ate or rested in our tent.

This conversation was probably the most bizarre one, and a tad disturbing, especially at a festival where animal rights activists were promoting vegetarianism and probably a large proportion of the festival goers objected to the killing of animals, for ideological reasons.

Ella - We are fairies. And we eat animals. So we are going to hunt for animals.
Me - Err... I'm not sure fairies eat animals.
Ella - Ye-eah. They eat animals, so we have to hunt for them.
Me - You know some people don't eat animals?
Ella - But we do.
Me - We do, but we don't need to if we don't want to.
Ella - But I want to.
Me - Ok then.
Ella - Now we have to go hunt animals so we can eat them.
Me - You know that hunting animals means that you have to kill them?
Ella - Yes, we're going to kill the animals so we can eat them.
Me - How are you going to kill them?
Ella - We have fire!
Me - Oh no, isn't that going to hurt the animal? I can't stand seeing animals hurt.
Ella - No, the fire is cold.
Me - Ok. So you're going to kill animals with cold fire. What kind of animal are you going to kill?
Ella - A snake!
Me - A snake? Do they taste nice? I've never had snake, so I really don't know if that's going to be yummy.
Ella - I don't know either.
Me - You do realise that once you've killed the animal you'll have to take it's skin off and cut open it's belly before you can eat it?
Ella - Ok.
Me - Actually, I don't want to kill animals. I just can't do it. That's why I buy my meat at the butcher's. I don't think I could kill an animal. I'd feel too sorry for them.
Ella - But there'll be more animals, mum.
Me - That's right, but only if we don't kill too many of them!
Ella - We'll only kill one. One snake. And then we'll cut it in pieces and put it on the table for morning tea.
Me - Oh no, you'll have to cook it first. You can't eat snake raw, I'm pretty sure.
Ella - Ok, we'll cook it and then it will be like fish!
Me - When we cook snake it will taste like fish? That's good then, because I like fish.
Ella - And we are big fairies, aren't we?
Me - Actually, I think fairies are rather little. Maybe we should catch a grasshopper to eat instead? Because fairies are little and they don't need much food.
Ella - Ok. We'll kill a grasshopper and cook it and then it will taste like shark!


A said...

I wonder what would happen if Ella and J or F had an animal eating conversation!
I do like the cold fire. No very practical for heating, but much safer for killing and cooking.

jeanie said...

Hmm - I don't know which one was the greater argument for vegetarianism, mother's or daughter's!

I love how she already has her analogies going.

Lin said...

A, I would love to hear that conversation!

Jeanie, I like eating meat, but that image of my little angel stalking animals to skin them and eat them just didn't sit right with me. lol

Rinke said...

Zo grappig!
dit was het eerste blogbericht dat ik zelf vertaald heb, maar het is zoooooo grappig!

Xxxx rinke

P.S.: naar't schijnt zijn slangen heel lekker... =p

Neet said...

Hilarious Lin!! I enjoyed hearing a little repeat of this conversation in her tired state on sunday... but the full version is much more amusing! Particularly the part about grasshoppers tasting like shark! :)